What Were They Thinking?!

WHEN unknown writer Charles Webb sold the rights to The Graduate for £14,000, he thought he was quids in. How wrong can you be?

Since 1967, when his novel was turned into a hit movie starring Dustin Hoffman and Anne Bancroft, it has made more than £60million.

Meanwhile, 66-year-old Webb and his wife Fred have debts of £30,000 and face eviction from their flat in Hove, East Sussex.

Record Boss Who Turned Down The Beatles

IN 1962, the year before Beatlemania erupted in Britain, the Fab Four travelled from Liverpool to London in a bid to get signed by Decca Records.

At their audition, Lennon, McCartney, Harrison and then drummer Pete Best belted out 15 songs but Decca boss Dick Rowe was unimpressed and turned the band down. He complained they sounded too much like The Shadows, adding: "Guitar groups are on the way out."

Instead he signed Brian Poole and the Tremeloes. Oops.

Wannabe Who Quit Spice Girls

IN 1994, more than 400 hopefuls replied to an ad wanting five girls for a new group. And Victoria Adams, Mel Brown, Geri Halliwell, Melanie Chisholm and Michelle Stephenson were duly signed up.

But after months of hard graft with nothing to show for it, 25-year-old Michelle quit to be replaced by Emma Bunton.

Two months on, The Spice Girls signed a £2million deal and became one of the biggest bands of the '90s. Michelle sighs: "You can't spend your life regretting things."

Toy Firm Could Have Had The Monopoly

IT'S the biggest-selling board game in the world, but Monopoly's inventor had a hard time trying to get it into shops.

Unemployed salesman Charles Darrow, from Pennsylvania, created the real-estate game in 1933. But when he approached Parker Brothers to see if they'd be interested in marketing his creation, they pointed out 52 errors - including the fact it took too long to play, and turned him down.

He put it on sale himself at $4 a set - and the toy company was forced to buy him out a year later when it became a huge success.

Studio That Lost Star Wars

BACK in 1975, up-andcoming director George Lucas pitched a movie idea to Universal about an epic intergalactic battle between good and evil.

But the film studio wasn't interested, calling the script unfathomable and silly. So Lucas took Star Wars to 20th Century Fox instead.

Since its release in 1977, the hit sci-fi movie and its sequels have made over £1.5billion.

"Silly" money indeed..

Missed Window Of Opportunity

SOFTWARE genius Gary Kildall turned down a deal that could have made him the richest man in the world.

In 1980, computer giant IBM offered him the chance to supply an operating system for their PCs.

When he turned them down, the firm went to Bill Gates' Microsoft which snapped up the offer.

Now Gates is worth £28billion while Kildall died in a 1994 brawl.

No Notes For Music Pioneer

APPLE'S iPod is the world's fastest-selling electrical item, shifting 41 million units in five years.

Just don't mention it to Britain's Kane Kramer, who invented a way of storing music on a digital chip back in 1979. Nine years later, he couldn't afford to renew the patents and the technology became public property.

Kramer, who now runs a Hertfordshire furniture shop, says: "In a way, I'm the world's biggest failure."

Genius's Power Failure

NIKOLA Tesla was the genius behind the neon bulb, neon lights. He also formulated the principles of radio, radar and the microwave oven.

A Slav immigrant to the US, he was hailed as the world's greatest inventor and earned lucrative royalties. Unfortunately he ploughed his money into an ill-fated lab and a wireless transmitter and ran out of money before it could be completed.

He sold the rights to all his inventions to electrical firm Westinghouse for $216,000. While others made millions from his research, Tesla died penniless in 1943.

Star Who Wished He'd Given A Damn

IT'S one of the best-loved movies ever, but Gary Cooper wasn't interested in starring in Gone With The Wind.

When Cooper learned the studio had found an actor to play Rhett Butler, he commented: "I'm just glad it'll be Clark Gable who's falling flat on his face, and not Gary Cooper."

Doh!

Publishers Who Didn't Believe In JK's Magic

IT'S the tale of a teenage wizard which has be en translated into 47 languages and kick-started a literary phenomenon that's sold 130 million books.

But when Scottish author JK Rowling tried to find a publisher for Harry Potter And The Philosopher's Stone in 1996 she was turned down by nine publishers, including Transworld, HarperCollins and Penguin.

Finally Bloomsbury took it on, and the rest is publishing history.

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Cussing 101

A 6 year old and a 4 year old are upstairs in their bedroom. "You know what?" says the 6 year old. "I think it's about time we started cussing."

The 4 year old nods his head in approval. The 6 year old continues, "When we go downstairs for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with 'hell' and you say something with 'ass'."

The 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm.

When their mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6 year old what he wants for breakfast, he replies, "Aw, hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios."

WHACK! He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up, and runs upstairs crying his eyes out, with his mother in hot pursuit, slapping his rear with every step. His mom locks him in his room and shouts, "You can just stay there until I let you out!"

She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4 year old and asks with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?"

"I don't know," he blubbers, "but you can bet your fat ass it won't be Cheerios."

April 19

Today as I was going through my planner I glanced at the date at the top of the page -- April 19. A day of infamy. I promptly checked CNN.com to see if there were any catastrophe's taking place in the world. There were none -- so far so good. Then I picked up the phone to wish my father a happy birthday.

As one born on Friday the 13th, I am accustomed to doom and gloom on my special day -- a plane sliding off the runway in Washington D.C. into the Potomac River, a circus train crashing, etc.

The father though had a benign birthdate -- April 19. But now it is associated with the Branch Davidians fire in Waco and the Oklahoma City bombing by Timothy McVeigh. That being said, I have good reason to check the news before wishing him a happy birthday.

My father is responsible for my motorcycle gene - he was the hell raising biker from the wrong side of the tracks that got caught up with the spoiled little rich girl. My mother sprung it on him one weekend that she wasn't really 18 but 15 and since he seemed to handle that info with relative calm, she sprung it on him the next weekend that she was pregnant.

I think he's still shell shocked from that news.

Anyway -- another disaster free April 19th!

Cars, Bikes and Visualization....

I have my beloved Akasha back.

I had been thinking of selling her because of the never ending issues I seemed to be having. The Illustrious One adamantly told me that I would have to be crazy to sell her because she and I belong together. I knew he was right . My girl and I celebrated our 11th anniversary on April 11.

I spoke to one of my partners in crime, Nicky Bootz, about selling her since he's well versed in Corvettes. I believe his calm, wise counsel was along the lines of ... "Are you fucking nuts?"

My friend Pete, a former owner of 8 Corvettes, commandeered the situation and found a highly reliable gentleman that replaced her radiator -- brand new, fully warranted for $340.

On the Superstition front, Scott Arndt takes excellent care of her. He replaced her rear brakes - while I try to avoid braking as much as possible, she was unfortunately getting metal to metal. I asked Scott if I should get an oil change and after pulling out the dipstick and looking at the oil he said, "Nah -- you can still see through it."

I've mentioned to a neighbor Scott's comments and he replied, "An honest mechanic?! Wow!" Ha!

I am very fortunate to have some outstanding men in my life looking out for me.

Also on the Scott Arndt front he is now back to having his own shop. He will do service work for select people and building bikes. He's very happy to be back doing his own thing.

I think a lot of us in this industry just can't deal with being employees -- I know I can't. Often when people ask me what I do, I reply - "Whatever it takes to keep me out of a cubicle." The Illustrious One and I have discussed this -- so many people need to know what their paycheck will be every two weeks, when their vacation time is, etc. And I guess for them that's their comfort zone.

For me, while I am quite fond of large denomination new currency notes, I have to confess that I must have freedom and it works for me. I work on interesting projects, meen dynamic people, I keep crazy hours but if I want to take a more scenic route home - I can. Because I can always do my work at 3:00am if the mood hits - I am nocturnal by nature after all.

I believe the saying - "Do what you love and the money will follow." I strongly believe in the power of visualization. I have pictured things strongly like a Corvette, a Harley, a perfect condition matching numbered Peter Max Donald Duck Suite, etc.

For 9 years I have pictured a Waterford Mooncoin decanter -- strange I know -- but I have a reason. While Waterford never discontinues a pattern, they do assign many patterns to "specialty" status which means they only make them once a year. So it behooves me to keep a watch on eBay to replace my collection that was stolen many years ago. The bad thing is that once a pattern goes to specialty status, Waterford for some reason will destroy the mold for the decanter. Soooo -- the decanter has been unavailable for more than a decade and for the first time since I started using eBay in '97, I found one for sale.

My current visualization goal is a 3-floor townhome near McKinney Avenue -- hardwoods, lots of light, 2-car garage, etc.

Somehow, someway, I'll make it happen.

The Blog of Kevin Ray Underwood -- Sick, Perverted Killer of Jamie Rose Bolin

Why, in some cases, does the death penalty have to be so humane?

I know it's Easter and we should be loving our fellow man, but damn it's hard to conjure up any sympathy or empathy for a beast like Underwood. For those that have heard that he had a blog - here's a link to it: http://www.futureworldruler.blogspot.com/

The sheer horror of what Jamie Rose Bolin must have gone through in her last moments on Earth. The reality that her loved ones must somehow come to grips with -- and her poor father, whose entire life was centered around this child, is heavily sedated because reality is too awful for him right now.

The only thing to take comfort in is knowing that Jamie is in a better place now.

If You Think Getting Up In The Morning Is Hard --- You Should Try Rising From The Dead...

Christianity -- the faith that preaches love for your fellow man.

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How Many Soldiers Died For Freedom Of Speech?

(The following was received via email.....Raine)

This is a slap in the face to every veteran of the United States of America, and to everyone that fought and died to free Texas from the Mexican government. Now these ignorant kids think it's ok to do this to our flag. And, the sad thing is they will get away with it.

They say that they are flying the Mexican flag as a sign of pride of their heritage. Well, if your so damn proud of Mexico, go back there. Don't get me wrong....if you're an immigrant, and you're here legally...more power to you...... I suppose it would be OK for me to fly the rebel flag above the American flag? I mean, I'm just showing my pride for my southern heritage!!! The blacks would lose their minds if I did that.

Not only that, but if we as LEGAL American citizens go to any foreign country, we are expected to abide by their rules and speak their language. No way in Hell would we get away with flying our flag over their upside down flag. Don't think for a second that our government is going to make these illegal immigrants go home.....too freaking scared they'll lose a vote or something. This great country of ours is going downhill in a hurry, and we are watching it happen...

These students are in America! Not Mexico. If you want to stay here America comes first, last, and always otherwise go back and make it better where ever you came from but don't try to turn my country into yours by ILLEGALLY entering mine and then demanding all the benefits of a LEGAL citizen of our nation... NO funding from federal tax dollars for any student out of class that day or any other day for such subversive activities... teacher led or not. Subject: American flag v. Mexican flag at CA. high school--disgusting public acts THE AMERICAN FLAG COMES SECOND By Michelle Malkin March 29, 2006 01:15 AM You will not see this heart-stopping photo on the front page of the NY Times or on the lead story of the major news networks. You should (hat tip: Mika and F/R):

03/28 : Student protest in Whittier area students from Pioneer, California and Whittier high schools walked out of classes to protest the proposed federal immigration bill March 27, 2006. The protestors put up the Mexican flag over the American flag flying upside down at Montebello High. (Leo Jarzomb/Staff photo)

Stunts like this will be the nail in the coffin of any guest-worker/amnesty plan on the table in Washington. The image of the American flag subsumed to another and turned upside down on American soil is already spreading on Internet forums and via e-mail.

Pass this along to every American citizen in your address books and to every representative in the state and federal government. If you choose to remain uninvolved do not be amazed when you no longer have a nation to call your own nor anything you have worked for left since it will be "redistributed" to the activists while you are so peacefully staying out of the "fray".

Check history, it is full of nations/empires that disappeared when its citizens no longer held their core beliefs and values. One person CAN make a difference. One plus one plus one plus one plus one plus one.........

The battle for our secure borders and immigration laws that actually mean something, however, hasn't even begun.

Johnny Chop Memorial and Is Nissan Responsible

Roland Sands will be having an open house memorial service for Johnny Chop tomorrow -- you can check out the details at www.rolandsands.com. Johnny's family has scheduled an official memorial service; however, I'm not at liberty to disclose the details yet. Once the family makes the official announcement, I will make a posting as well as I know a lot of people are visiting this blog for Johnny Chop info.

In regards to the Johnny Chop Invitational -- it IS still a go and will be held in Long Beach in June.

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On a different note, I'm just going to vent about a situation that kind of has me miffed for some reason. The Illustrious One and I have known a guy (we'll call him DC) for a number of years. DC is one of these guys that kind of has a dark cloud hanging over him - granted he's been battling the booze for quite some time, but it's more than that.

When I co-owned the tech company, DC would show up every now and again wanting to do sales -- he never sold anything but The Illustrious One kept giving him a chance. I freely admit to having a low tolerance for stupidity and DC just seemed to keep pushing that button.

He roughhoused with Harley Amadeus (my doberman) which somehow made a toe nail rip out of his paw. I had just gotten him out of splint from when he slid into the gate and then the nail happens. I carried Harley Amadeus to my car with her pale gray interior and the poor baby bled all over her. He had to be in a splint yet again.

DC opts to drive us to a meeting and as he's flying down the road at 70 mph the car starts beeping. He had to blow into a breathalyzer in the car to keep the car running! I was so stressed after that trip.

The cherry on the icing of the cake was when DC brought some female he met at a recovery house to our offices and started boning her -- IN A PLACE OF BUSINESS.

That was just it for me.

So fast forward a couple years and I'm flipping through the paper and see an article about some guy that was backing out of his driveway and ran over his 3 year old daughter killing her. You got it -- it was DC.

We attended the funeral and DC's breath reeked of alcohol from 10' away.

Now -- DC and his wife are SUING Nissan. Why, pray tell? It seems that somehow it's Nissan's fault that they didn't have cameras in the back of the SUV's showing people what they are about to back into.

So let me get this straight -- we've been driving cars for about 100 years with no cameras behind us and TAKING RESPONSIBILTY FOR OUR OWN ACTIONS and this yahoo has his "tragedy" as he refers to it and it's Nissan's fault?!

Supposedly Nissan has offered $20 million to settle the case -- supposedly the wife turned it down. Supposedly they are going to court in a couple weeks to go after $60-80 million. Talk about blood money. It just disgusts me.

I guess what is really bothering me about all of this is that I KNOW how DC drives -- I've seen him fly into reverse to take off, I know he has bamboozled his neighbors into lending him their cars so he won't have to deal with the breathalyzer -- and I guess I can just too easily visualize him flying out of the house, jumping in the car and slamming it into reverse.

And I just don't see how this is Nissan's fault nor financial responsibility.

DC talked to The Illustrious One to bemoan all the bs his attorneyw as putting him through. Seems the attorney is prepring DC for what Nissan's attorneys will do -- like bring up all his DWI's. DC thinks it's unfair.

Our society has become too "law suit happy". I know we are too far down that slippery slope but it sure would be nice if people took responsibility for their actions again. Because honestly, if someone can't look in their rear view or side mirrors, why would they look at a monitor in the dash board? Next they will be suing Nissan because a personal assistant wasn't made available to guide them out of their parking spaces.

Advice For Men From A Sensitive Man...

It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger. When you notice this, try not to yell at them.. Some are oversensitive, and there's nothing worse than an oversensitive woman.

My name is Ron......Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Julie.

When I took "early retirement" last year, it became necessary for Julie to get a full-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we needed. Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age. I usually get home from the golf course about the same time she gets home from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't yell at her. Instead , I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill at the club so eating out is not reasonable. I'm ready for some home cooked grub when I hit that door.

She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it's not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won't clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed.

Another symptom of aging is complaining, I think. For example she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. But, boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days.! That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any (if you know what I mean). I like to think tact is one of my strong points.

When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the yard. I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while.. And, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me too.

I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Julie. I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older.

However, guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile. After all, we are put on this earth to help each other...

Signed,

Ron

EDITOR'S NOTE: Ron died suddenly on October 3rd. He was found with a Calloway extra long 50-inch Big Bertha Driver II rammed up his ass, with only 2 inches of grip showing. His wife Julie was arrested, but the all-woman Grand Jury accepted her defense that he accidentally sat down on it very suddenly.

Internationally Known Star WEARS NO PANTS To His Hollywood Star Ceremony!

Will the celebrity madness ever cease? First we are inundated with pre-pubescent teens going on the cover of People Magazine to talk about their stays in rehab facilities.

Then the insanity of all things relating to Michael Jackson.

And now we are confronted with the timeless, lovable Winnie-The-Pooh being ostracized for going pantless to his award ceremony! This gives a whole new meaning to Sans-A-Belt!!

I shudder to think of how we will now be inundated with expose's on Pooh & Paris Hilton -- Pooh & Spice Girl du Jour --- eh gads I shudder to think of what Page Six and the National Enquirer will do with this.

Oh Pooh!!

Don't forsake us Pooh Bear -- grab your honey pot and get back to the 100 Acre Wood -- it's too brutal out here for you!!

MR. PRESIDENT, I'M HEADED TO MEXICO

Dear President Bush, and all Members of the House & the Senate:

I'm about to plan a little trip with my family and extended family, and I would like to ask you to assist me. I'm going to walk across the border from the U.S. into Mexico, and I need to make a few arrangements. I know you can help with this.

I plan to skip all the legal stuff like visas, passports, immigration quotas and laws. I'm sure they handle those things the same way you do here. So, would you mind telling your buddy, President Vicente Fox, that I'm on my way over? Please let him know that I will be expecting the following:

1. Free medical care for my entire family.
2. English-speaking government bureaucrats for all services I might need, whether I use them or not.
3. All government forms need to be printed in English.
4. I want my kids to be taught by English-speaking teachers.
5. Schools need to include classes on American culture and history.
6. I want my kids to see the American flag flying on the top of the flag pole at their school with the Mexican flag flying lower down.
7. Please plan to feed my kids at school for both breakfast and lunch.
8. I will need a local Mexican driver's license so I can get easy access to government services.
9. I do not plan to have any car insurance, and I won't make any effort to learn local traffic laws.
10. In case one of the Mexican police officers does not get the memo from Pres. Fox to leave me alone, please be sure that all police officers speak English.
11. I plan to fly the U.S. flag from my house top, put flag decals on my car, and have a gigantic celebration on July 4th. I do not want any complaints or negative comments from the locals.
12. I would also like to have a nice job without paying any taxes, and don't enforce any labor laws or tax laws.
13. Please tell all the people in the country to be extremely nice and never say a critical word about me, or about the strain I might place on the economy.

I know this is an easy request because you already do all these things for all the people who come to the U.S. from Mexico. I am sure that Pres. Fox won't mind returning the favor if you ask him nicely.

However, if he gives you any trouble, just invite him to go quail hunting with your V.P.

Thank you so much for your kind help.

Sincerely,

Joe Taxpayer

Johnny Chop -- Info as of 5 April 06

As there has been so much traffic to my blog due to people doing searches on "Johnny Chop", I am including the press release I received today.

Also, I have inserted a footnote after this PR due to some misinformation that has been listed in here. The information regarding the Real Original Biker Build-Off in this PR was not confirmed by me and, while myself and the other producers appreciate the mention, the information is in fact incorrect.:

5/3/71 - 3/28/06

Johnny "Chop" Vasko, one of the finest classic-old school builders in the custom motorcycle industry, unexpectedly passed away at 7:30am, on Tuesday, March 28, from heart complications at the age of 34. Industry followers will greatly miss Johnny's very unique style and personality. Johnny Chop was feated as a 2005 Discovery Channel biker-build off contender, and a 2005 Hard Rock Road House Builder. With appearances on ESPN, ESPN2, The Discovery Channel, and Chopper Nation, Johnny Chop touched millions of lives throughout the world. He traveled to almost every bike week event and rally, and his presence graced dozens of biker publications throughout the world. Johnny's website described his unique style as being "not the influence of any one thing in the last ten years but the collective sum of all extra detail that makes his late 60's Frisco-style choppers unique. A simple and basic design that steps away from gaudy is more visually practical, yet punk rock." Johnny was currently working on filming a new show for The Real Original Bike build Off, www.BannedBreed.com, featuring an episode with friend and industry builder Roland Sands of Roland Sands Design and Performance Machines. This filming will continue as well as promotions for the Johnny Chop Invitational show on June 23-25, 2006 at the Queen Mary in Long Beach, California. For more details on Johnny's unique legacy and to keep his legacy alive visit www.JohnnyChop.com. For more info on the upcoming Johnny Chop invitational and memorial tribute visit www.JohnnyChopInvitational.com. For more information on the Johnny "Chop" Vasko Memorial Block Party please visit www.RolandSands.com.

***NOTE FROM RAINE --- For those that read this blog that are aware of Johnny's involvement with the ROBBO series, of which I am one of the producers, the official press release regarding how Johnny's death has affected this series has not yet been issued.

Out of respect for Johnny, we will not issue the ROBBO press release until after his memorial service.

Numbers Finally In Line

On Wednesday morning, at two minutes and three seconds after 1:00 A.M., the time and date will read:

....

01:02:03, 04/05/06

....

This will never happen again.

A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words

These are just some light hearted images -- we begin with Richard Branson. Richard, I adore you, but even on a slender boy like you the Union Jack pattern gives you chubby thighs!!

April 9 -- Taking A Stand for America

America is made up of immigrants and I doubt few of us really have any issues with someone that wants to come here to make a better life for themselves. However, to brazenly break the law and then expect the same rights, is pushing it a bit.

Honestly, why should a Mexican citizen be treated any differently than someone from another nation? If we allow one country carte blanche, why don't we just allow everyone in? And furthermore, if Mexico is all that, why aren't these people back in Mexico trying to make their own country better? It's pointless to take to the American streets waving the Mexican flag and screaming "Viva Mexico" and then expect Americans to embrace the cause.

I was most disturbed to see the above image in the Dallas Morning News last week. Michelle Marquez was criticized for having a U.S. flag during an immigartion protest. She said, "My heart is with the Mexican flag and Mexico but I'm standing on American ground and I'm Mexican-American."

At times like this, I think of that brilliant quote from Theodore Roosevelt:

... There is no room in this country for hyphenated Americanism. When I refer to hyphenated Americans, I do not refer to naturalized Americans. Some of the very best Americans I have ever known were naturalized Americans, Americans born abroad. But a hyphenated American is not an American at all. This is just as true of the man who puts "native" before the hyphen as of the man who puts German or Irish or English or French before the hyphen. Americanism is a matter of the spirit and of the soul. Our allegiance must be purely to the United States. We must unsparingly condemn any man who holds any other allegiance. But if he is heartily and singly loyal to this Republic, then no matter where he was born, he is just as good an American as any one else.

The one absolutely certain way of bringing this nation to ruin, of preventing all possibility of its continuing to be a nation at all, would be to permit it to become a tangle of squabbling nationalities, an intricate knot of German-Americans, Irish-Americans, English-Americans, French-Americans, Scandinavian-Americans or Italian-Americans, each preserving its separate nationality, each at heart feeling more sympathy with Europeans of that nationality, than with the other citizens of the American Republic. The men who do not become Americans and nothing else are hyphenated Americans; and there ought to be no room for them in this country. The man who calls himself an American citizen and who yet shows by his actions that he is primarily the citizen of a foreign land, plays a thoroughly mischievous part in the life of our body politic. He has no place here; and the sooner he returns to the land to which he feels his real heart-allegiance, the better it will be for every good American. There is no such thing as a hyphenated American who is a good American. The only man who is a good American is the man who is an American and nothing else.


Laws exist for a reason -- and without them there would be anarchy.

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Pro America Rally - Dallas
April 9

Many of us have decided to meet at Poor Richard’s Restaurant in Plano at Ave. K and Park, at 8:00 am. We are going to have breakfast, then wait on some other rider groups that have decided to join us and ride out together up Hwy. 75 to Dallas City Hall.

KSU should be around 9:30 am to 10:00 am.

We are not protesting. We are going in support of America and her flag.

Mexican Nationalists have decided to have a Pro Amnesty/Pro Mexican Nationalist day and have utilized Hispanic radio, TV, internet and text messaging to get the message out. The expected Hispanic turn out is estimated at 200 to 300, 000 people.

We need to show our support of America and that we aren’t going to just surrender to the wishes of Mexican National interest. We want this to be a peaceful, orderly support for America and the flag, not a battle ground!

The media from all over the country will be there, and many politicians will be watching. Many of those politicians started caving in to the demands of the illegal aliens on what they wanted after seeing them in vast numbers on TV. As Americans we can do no less if we want our country.

Please either join us at Poor Richard’s Restaurant the morning of April 9th or come down early to Dallas City Hall.

Bring your flags, your voice and your patriotism, but leave your attitudes at home, let’s show them bikers can assembly peaceably too.

If you have any questions, please email: Ghost at the following email: tx_ghost@sbcglobal.net
Ghost President Republic Riders MC

Good night sweet prince -- Johnny Chop has died

My heart is breaking.

Johnny Chop has died.

He was only 34 years old.

Such a fantastic motorcycle builder.

He was a heart transplant recepient a few years ago. Yesterday he didn't feel too well and was taken to the hospital. In typical Johnny fashion he was joking with people at the hospital. At some point this A.M. his heart just gave out.

Johnny -- you were one of the good ones.

The best.

I will miss our conversations -- I will miss you.....

Pluck Your Twanger In The Artsy Springtime

I have this mapping program on my blog that allows me to see where people are visiting from and in some cases the search criteria they put into a search engine that prompted my blog to come up.

Recently, one of the most popular posts has been the one from February 25. It has the video link to the Rainbow episode that is just beyond naughty! A children's programme that is making references to "blowing all night", "Jane's lovely set of maracas", "bouncing your balls" and the all time favorite which is how people are finding this blog -- "pluck your twanger."

If you haven't visited the Feb 25 entry - this might be a time to do so to understand the popularity of this link.

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The Illustrious One and I attended the Easyriders show today at Fair Park. I was quite surprised -- crowds were light early afternoon and there was a noticable decrease in attendees. But some of my favs were on hand - Denny Garley of TC Customs, Jimmie Lee & John Coen of Three Two Choppers, Scott Arndt of Scott's Hardcore Kustoms and Mike DuSold of DuSold DeSigns.

Denny had his blue chopper there -- I don't know what it is about that bike but if I had the money I would buy it in a heartbeat. The use of colours is great -- a funky peacock blue, black and silver. I just love it -- great curves -- low and long. MmmmmmMmmm!

Most impressive accolades to Three Two -- they built a bad ass creation in 2 weeks. They decided on February 15th that they needed a new entry for this year's show circuit. In the immortal words of Paris HIlton -- "it's hot".

Scott Arndt was informed by his wife Lori a few weeks ago that he would be building an Evo for the show. Scott doesn't build Evo's. Lori is persuasive. He built one. It looks great and I love the sound of it -- deep, raw, throaty and sexy -- like all good bikes should sound!

Mike DuSold gave a sneak preview of his Metric Revolution bike. He had a primo location at the end of aisle 1 so everyone that rounded that corner paused, jaws dropped and tried to figure out just what the hell they were looking it. That big ass new Triumph motor inside the frame of a real DuSold original frame design.

I never even got to see that Triumph in it's original form. Mike picked it up, rode it a couple miles and promptly cut the frame in half. By the time I had arrived at his shop, there's dead bits of Triumph frame about on the floor and this massive motor on the worktable.

So now that spring is upon us, it's a non-stop dialogue of what shows are you going to, what trips are you taking, what work is going to be done to trick out the bike, etc. etc.

But for me - spring means something different -- the art shows. I LOVE them. Cottonwood, Wildflower! and ArtFest. I try to hoard money before the spring art shows because I simply MUST attend them and I find the most fantastic items. My passions are contemporary art and unique decorative accessories. I love great use of colours - bright & bold, textures and whimsy and thought provoking.

I also am enthralled with great photography.... the perfect landscape in Ireland with it's rich green land and haunting grey mists....the forlorn, scarred, old big brown bear sitting by the stream for all the world with his "just having one of those days" look on his face.

A couple people in the past have actually chastised me for not living and breathing motorcycles; I also have condemnations in regards to the Corvette because I don't attend every single club event. I am very fortunate to have the 2 great American toys, but I also love having a life filled with diversity in activities.

Diversity in an intregral part of living one's life. It's like art -- you don't see with your eyes -- you see with your brain. The eyes are a camera lense capturing the moment but the brain processes the image. And depending upon the diversity you've been exposed to in your life and how "open" or "closed" you are in thinking, helps to determine whether a Michelangelo's David or a Robert Mapplethrope is art or smut.

Try Out For Jeopardy!

Have you ever wanted to try out for Jeopardy? Wanted to see if you are as smart under the gun as you are slacking around on your sofa? Crave to earn more money than Ken Jennings?

Well, here is your chance -- go to this URL and pre-register as the online tests take place next week. http://www.jeopardy.com/onlinetest


Details of the online test:

On the night of your test, be at your computer and online 15 minutes before the test begins. Don't wait until the last minute!

Click on the "Log In / Launch Test" button. If you attempt to launch the test too early, you will be prompted to wait until the proper time, then re-launch.

Enter your User Name (your registered email address) and Password. When you are successfully logged in the countdown clock will appear. When the clock reaches :00 the test will begin. There will be no other prompts.

The test will begin at precisely three minutes after the hour and will take approximately 10 minutes to complete. For more details about the test, see below.

Taking the test:

The online test is a 50-question, 50-category test and will take approximately ten minutes to complete. Clues will appear one at a time and will run sequentially from one to fifty. You cannot pause, stop, or go back on the test. The test will not be repeated, and there will be no opportunity to review at the end of the test, nor to change any of your responses.

Timing:

You will have fifteen seconds to respond to each clue - or to change your answer - before the test automatically captures whatever you have typed and advances automatically to the next question. You will have the option to submit your response before the clock times out for a particular clue if you are ready to proceed, or you can wait for the full 15 seconds for your response to be automatically submitted.

Important Tips:

DO NOT PHRASE YOUR RESPONSE IN THE FORM OF A QUESTION! Only the relevant piece of information is necessary

A partial response may be enough to count as a correct answer so take a guess and put something down!

Remember to keep the categories in mind as you consider your response. Correct responses must fit within the parameters of the category as well as the clue.

This is not a spelling test, but try to be as accurate as possible in your responses.
In the case of proper names, last names are sufficient for the purposes of this test.

After the Test

The tests will be graded. Whether you pass or not, JEOPARDY! never reveals actual test scores. Depending on the number of people who achieve a passing score, a random selection process may need to be implemented. Those selected will be invited to come to their preferred audition city that was selected during registration to participate in the full audition process consisting of:

• Being tested with a new different 50-question test.
• Playing a "mock version" of JEOPARDY! to assess your game-playing skills
• A short personality interview
• If you pass all the requirements to become a contestant you will be entered into the contestant pool for one year.
• Passing these tests does not guarantee you an appearance on JEOPARDY! or make you automatically eligible to appear on the show.

2005 Stella Awards!

Time once again to review the winners of the Annual "Stella Awards."

The Stella Awards are named after 81 year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled hot coffee on herself and successfully sued McDonald's (in NM). That case inspired the Stella Awards for the most frivolous, ridiculous,successful law suits in the United States.Here are this year's winners:

5th Place (tie):Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $80,000. by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving little toddler was Ms. Robertson's son.

5th Place (tie):19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Mr. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.

5th Place (tie):Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a house he had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was malfunctioning.He couldn't re-enter the house because the door connecting the house and garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family was on vacation, and Mr.Dickson found himself locked in the garage for eight days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found, and a large bag of dry dog food. He sued the homeowner's insurance claiming the situation caused him unduemental anguish. The jury agreed, to the tune of $500,000. In my opinion this is so outrageous that it should have been 2nd Place!

4th Place:Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,500. and medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door neighbor's beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. The award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been just a little provoked at the time by Mr. Williams who had climbed over the fence into the yard and was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.

3rd Place:A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster,Pennsylvania, $113,500. after she slipped on a soft drink and broke her coccyx (tailbone). The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument.

2nd Place:Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the owner of a nightclub in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This occurred while Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the window in the ladies room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.

1st Place:This year's runaway winner was Mrs. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City,Oklahoma. Mrs. Grazinski purchased a brand new 32-foot Winnebago motor home. On her first trip home, (from an OU football game), having driven onto the freeway, she set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the driver's seat to go into the back and make herself a sandwich. Not surprisingly, the RV left the freeway, crashed and overturned. Mrs.Grazinski sued Winnebago for not advising her in the owner's manual that she couldn't actually do this. The jury awarded her $1,750,000, plus a new motor home. The company actually changed their manuals on the basis of this suit, just in case there were any other complete morons around.

No Nursing Home For Me!!

About 2 years ago I was on a cruise through the western Mediterranean aboard a Princess liner.

At dinner I noticed an elderly lady sitting alone along the rail of the grand stairway in the main dining room. I also noticed that all the staff, ships officers, waiters, busboys, etc., all seemed very familiar with this lady. I asked our waiter who the lady was, expecting to be told that she owned the line, but he said he only knew that she had been on board for the last four cruises, back to back.

As I left the dining room one evening I caught her eye and stopped to say hello. We chatted and I said, "I understand you've been on this ship forthe last four cruises". She replied, "Yes, that's true." I stated, "I don't understand" and she replied, without a pause, "It's cheaper than a nursing home".

So, there will be no nursing home in my future. When I get old and feeble,I am going to get on a Princess Cruise Ship.

The average cost for a nursing home is $200 per day. I have checked on reservations at Princess and I canget a long term discount and senior discount price of $135 per day.

That leaves $65 a day for:

1. Gratuities which will only be $10 per day.

2. I will have as many as 10 meals a day if I can waddle to the restaurant,or I can have room service (which means I can have breakfast in bed every day of the week).

3. Princess has as many as three swimming pools, a workout room, free washers and dryers, and shows every night.

4. They have free toothpaste and razors, and free soap and shampoo.

5 They will even treat you like a customer, not a patient. An extra $5 worth of tips will have the entire staff scrambling to help you.

6. I will get to meet new people every 7 or 14 days.

7. T.V. broken? Light bulb need changing? Need to have the mattressreplaced? No Problem! They will fix everything and apologize for your inconvenience.

8. Clean sheets and towels every day, and you don't even have to ask for them.

9. If you fall in the nursing home and break a hip you are on Medicare; if you fall and break a hip on the Princess ship they will upgrade you to asuite for the rest of your life.

Now hold on for the best!

Do you want to see South America, the Panama Canal, Tahiti, Australia, New Zealand, Asia, or name where you want to go? Princess will have a ship ready to go. So don't look for me in a nursing home, just call shore to ship.

PS - And don't forget, when you die, they just dump you over the side at no charge.

A Kinky Man After My Own Heart

On the "let's elect Kinky governor of Texas" front, there are a couple developments.

According to the mainstream press if the election were held today Kinky would only receive 10% of the vote. Yet in an online poll by the Austin Statesman, it shows Kinky would receive 46% of the vote.

Also, it seems some running scared types have been graciously offering to pick up signed petitions - no one knows who they are or even what candidate they represent so we will hold off on judgement as to whether they are up to no good!

And lastly, a true man after my own heart - Kinky wants to rename certain highways after Waylon Jennings, Willie Nelson, Buddy Holly, Bob Willis, Stevie Ray Vaughn & Janis Joplin.......

Kinky --- you had me at Stevie Ray Vaughn.

Idle Ramblings

Here are a few things to think about that you might not have never thought about:


When does a crumb become a crumb? Is it the split second the fragment leaves the mass or once the fragment hits a solid surface? -- I've wondered about this since 3rd grade and I have no idea why.

Can you cry under water?

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.

Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

If Wyle E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?

Cheaters & Elimidate

I have a confession to the world -- people in Dallas watch Cheaters.

You may think that people in cities all across this great land of ours watches Cheaters; but Dallasites are worse.

Why?

Because 95% of the shows are taped here. We like to watch to see where they are when they are catting around and/or the confrontation happens. Ever since that damn Janet "let's flash my tit to the world" Jackson screw up, Cheaters has been blurring signage more. Sometimes that can make it a bit more challenging, but if you are in the know, 9 times out of 10 you can figure out where they are.

There is a lot of filming that goes on in this city for various commercials, tv shows & films; but without fail, everyone's first thought is "Oh my God, Cheaters is here!" whenever a camera crew shows up.

When I was working with Elimidate, there were so many people asking, "Is this Cheaters?" I would tell them no, it's the show before you need Cheaters. I heard so many stories about the aftermath of Cheaters taping somewhere.

A waiter who worked at a mexican food place in Farmer's Market said that just the week before, one of his best clients was in a secluded table having a lovely dinner. The waiter went into the kitchen to get the flan for dessert and when he came back out there was a full blown brawl going on with his best customer right in the middle of it. He shook his head sadly at the thought and grumbled how he felt that was the last time he would see that customer -- and he tipped so well.

There was a lot of rumbling that the shows were staged and I think for the first season that was probably true because they needed to get show made. But once the viewing audience understood what was going on -- hold back the door. I think every potentially scorned lover in this area has thought of contacting Cheaters.

We all aleady know what is involved -- if Cheaters does the background work and indeed finds proof, you must go on camera with a confrontation otherwise you have to pay them for their detective work. This may sound callous but it makes business sense to me. They are hiring people to get the dirt so they either need content for their show or to be reimbursed.

Now earlier I mentioned Elimidate and a lot of people ask me what that show is really like, so if you are interested in being on it, get your pen and take notes:

Elimidate will breeze into town and hit various clubs, ask potential candidates to fill out questionnaires and have their photos taken. Once they go back to LA, they determine who would be best for the show, then phone the people up to let them know a day they should block off.

Upon Elimidate returning to town a few weeks later to begin taping, they will scout locations on day 1 and then begin taping usually on day 2. They will have production assitants hired, 1 for the "chooser" and 3 for the "contestants".

The PA's must drive to pick up their respective person in the beginning of the day and drive them to the staging area where taping will begin. They typical pick up time is between 8 - 10 a.m.

Upon reaching the staging area, all the "players" are kept out of sight of one another. They will usually be sitting in a car for up to an hour. In the meantime, the PA's are supposed to hit the producers car for cocktails -- and they are to pour with a heavy hand. Yes, that's right, well before noon, the "players" should be getting trashed.

During this time, the producers will go up to the various "players" and do a meet & greet and go over some of their questionnaires. Finally, the call comes through to take the respective "player" to their staging area - yet stay out of sight of their opponents.

When you see the players walk up for the introduction, that is indeed the first time they see one another. Now between takes, the producers are runninng up to the players to let them know some inside dirt gathered from an opponents questionnaire and that is how they get the verbal ammunition to throw at one another.

Also, between takes, the players should be sipping on cocktails....after all, tipsy players make for better programming! If all goes well, the intro is wrapped in a few hours -- that's right, that 3 minutes of fun is usually 2-3 hours of taping.

Once the first player is cut, they tape their "they can kiss my ass" monologue for the camera and then they sashay into the distance. At that point, they gather their belongings and are placed into a hired car (Town Car or Limo) for their ride home. A lot of them want to stay to watch the rest of the taping, but legally, Elimidate has to show proof that the player was returned to their place of origin.

If the player wants to come back o their own, they can, but Elimidate won't allow them to just hang out. Usually after segment 1 or 2, a token meal is served. Their craft services blows -- string cheese & peanut butter and crackers -- yuck!

Now usually for one of the later segments, the players change ito party clothes to go out somewhere. Those clothes are already on hand -- everything the player needs for the day has to have been brought with them. They end up changing outfits in a public rest room. If the female players are lucky, they will have a PA that will carry their purse so that between takes they can touch up. This is a sure fire way to piss off the other players because they know they are wilting while their opponent is looking better. So if you plan on being on Elimidate, ask your PA to carry your purse for you.

The outcome -- of the 6 shows taped in Dallas, 2 of the "couples" actually hit it off and that was usually because they knew the same circle of friends, etc. The other 4 shows were people just wanting to get the hell out of there when it was all over.

Typically, the full shooting day lasts 10 - 12 hours. There is no financial payment for Elimidate; however, you do get air time which is craved by many "MAW's" (model / actress / whatevers).

Also, I don't know if Elimidate will come back to Dallas any time soon (it's been 2 years since they were here), primarily because they had so many problems getting the players to drink. A lot of the players on the show A) had no desire to drink before Noon or B) were very health concious and only wanted water or C) they knew what was going on immediately and choose not to be a drunken buffoon for American viewers.

So there you have it -- everything you might or might not have wanted to know about Cheaters & Elimidate!

Come Out of the Closet, Mr. Hayes

Ok - let me get this straight -- Issac Hayes quits South Park due to their religious intolerance.

The guy has no problem with making fun of Christians, Jesus, Santa Claus, Muslems, Jews, Blacks, etc., but one very well written spoof on Scientology (of which he is a follower) sends him off the deep edge?

How on Earth did he tolerate the inclusion of Token (the "token" black kid of the bunch)?

How did he tolerate "Operation Follow the Darkie" when the US invaded Canada in the film?!

He subjected the world to his "Chocolate Salty Balls" song yet we took it all in stride.

Please Mr. Hayes -- you've profited very handsomely from South Park. Before that series the only thing you were known for well was singing the theme song to Shaft and that ain't exactly Pavarotti in terms of talent!

Fasting -- For How Long?

I've not eaten in a few days.

I take that back, yesterday I had a Corona which gave me an instant buzz and then a small cup of Paciugo gelato. I was so stuffed I was miserable for about 20 minutes.

The last food I remember having before that was last Wenesday when I crunched on 2 carrots -- I was stuffed before I got to the 2nd carrot but made myself eat it.

I've been drinking a lot of water with lime, sometimes I may crack open a Rockstar and I know on Saturday I had a 2 serving container of Odwalla Super Food....love that stuff!

I'm not sick and heaven knows I'm not anorexic by any stretch of the imagination. I think that since I have knowingly gone into a fast on a few ocassions before, that this time, my body just slid into it naturally.

There are a lot of people that fast for spiritual reasons -- that's not me. What I have noticed is that when I fast my energy level increases and stays steady all day long; I also sleep less and better. My thinking is sharp, I ride the bike fine with no lightheadedness and my skin feels softer.

At some point I will crave food again and at that time I will eat. It will usually start off with craving fruits or vegetables and then something heavier or more decadent.

If you have never tried fasting, I do recommend it. It's natural and it gives your body a break. The average American spends 1/3 of their calories digesting food -- that's an awful lot of energy. If you are interested in the benefits of fasting, definitely make use of Google and some of these sites:

• Detox Cleansing Thru Fasting
• Fasting Options

Spring is almost upon us and this is the perfect time to do a fast if you've ever considered one!

A Kinky Weekend in Dallas ~ or ~ Never Fuck Up A Girl's Corvette

Ok boys and girls - and especially for those of you that are registered Texas voters -- the drive to get Kinky Friedman on the ballot is officially on.

The Republicans have Rick Perry and the lardasses have some cat named Chris Bell from Houston. Republican Carol Strayhorn is still running on the Independent ticket but everyone knows she's a R. And then there's Kinky.

He made an appareance on a float in the Greenville Avenue St. Patrick's Day Parade yesterday and a great time was had by all. If you want to know where you can go to get signed up on the Kinky petition so he is assured a spot on the Governor's ballot, just check out this site.

I made the mistake of riding down Greenville yesterday in the midst of the parade aftermath -- dear heavens -- dead beads, dead beer bottles, dead banners strewn all about the place. And what the hell is it with revving motorcycle pipes and drunk people in khaki shorts and flip flops? They go ballistic -- they really need a life.

On a different note, I heard it was a real life Slam Bang Theater in Daytona -- people crashing head on into one another, SUV's slamming into biker's from behind -- in a couple wrecks the bodies and bikes were so mangled people were unsure what bits and pieces belonged to which.

On yet a different note, I have been dealing with an issue for the past 8 months regarding my beloved Akasha. Hellatiously long story short, Corvettes of Dallas, those sorry sons of bitches, jacked up my car. There's a friggin puncture wound in the bit of plastic between two sections of aluminum in the upper left portion of the radiator -- they claim it's a hairline crack -- I guess they attended the Slick Willy School o' Definitions because I saw the damn thing and it looks like someone slammed a screwdriver into it.

Then they had the gall to suggest I save a whopping $40 by placing a used old radiator from a 94 with 40k more miles on it than my car -- I just wanted to bitch slap someone that day. This all happened in late August and I'm still royally pissed about it.

I confess to having "only child syndrome" -- which translates to "Don't fuck with my things" and fuck with my car they did. I know I'm a girl with a sports car but my money is just as green as a guy's.

Akasha is beautiful - she receives compliments all the time. Her official color is "bright aqua metallic" but it's teal. With light gray & black interior. She's so mellow. April 10 will be our 11th anniversary. I bought here when I thought I was going to be living in South Beach -- her plates were too kewl -- "DECADNT" -- I'm still trying to figure out kewl plates for Texas. As you can gather, I adore this car -- more than most people I know well.

So I came to the conclusion that perhaps I should sell her to someone that can TLC her. I have 1 person adamant that I should sell, 3 that are on the fence and everyone else replies, "Are you fucking nuts?!" Now granted it's all men who respond this way but it comes down to -- I've put almost $3k into her in the past year with all new hoses, water pump, power steering fluid pump, fan motor, etc etc. I know she needs a new radiator no thanks to those walking asses at Corvettes of Dallas and at some point she will need a new optispark. She also will need fru fru stuff like new window tint, new carpeting, etc.

So I guess it comes down to I need to figure out how to secure about $2-5k and just trick her out with everything she needs and God willing that should resolve everything.

And in closing regarding Corvettes of Dallas and the owner of the service area, David Upshaw, I have been STUNNED by how many people have told me stories about how awful their service is and if they had known I was going there they would have commandered my car away from that place. Even one of Upshaw's own relatives told me they would NEVER take their Corvette there!

Other specialty Corvette places in town have also said that whatever little respect they had left for CoD is totally shot after hearing what I went through -- and for the record, unlike what CoD said, a fucking horn does not ATROPHY from lack of use. The damn wires get jogged loose when buffoons replace the water pump and no amount of honking the horn while going down the road will make it return to full power -- yeah right, like I was going to do that!

.....God I wish I could just put on my bike boots with the silver toe tips and just kick those good old boys right in the nuts.

Hard.

Repeatedly.