Friday, August 04, 2006

FREE 6 Flags Tickets

So I have these 4 tickets to Six Flags over Texas that need to be used before August 27. Tomorrow it will be 103 degrees here. Six Flags has a sick fascination with fresh, black asphalt. It's a 103 degrees here. People in line next to you are sweaty. Drinks are overpriced. It's 103 degrees here.

As much as I love love love the Titan (I love a good roller coaster!), I just cannot bring myself to drag me and The Illustrious One to suffer in this heat. While I have proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that The Illustrious One is a certifiable masochist, I, however, am not. I'll discuss the masochist element on another post.

So I thought of posting the tix for sale but then decided to offer them for free in exchange for the best "reason" -- here is my post on Craigs List:

You read that right! I have 4 FREE 6 Flags Tickets that must be used before this August 27. I had to put $1 in the price field otherwise it wouldn't let me list this ad -- but there is no money involved. It's all FREE! The only thing I ask in exchange is for you to give me the best "reason" as to why you NEED these tickets to go to 6 Flags while we are in the midst of this hot-ass summer!! I like funny / witty "reasons" - I do NOT NOT NOT go for sob stories. Tales of woe about widows, orphans, dogs running away, etc., is not what I am interested in. Entertain me - and 6 Flags will entertain you. Why am I giving them away? Because it's illegal to sell them! They are COMPLIMENTARY tickets won through KZPS 92.5 radio. The only other requirement is that you have to come to my part of town to pick them up (Frankford / N. Dallas Tollway). Email me your "reason" along your contact name/number.

Here are some of the more unique replies I have received so far:

Because studies have shown that the rush from rollercoasters causes release of adrenaline and endorphins which will have an aphrodisiactic effect the human body. Please… I NEED this to happen to my wife… I figure if I get her on enough roller coasters I won’t be ABLE to keep her clothes on when we get home.”



I have been trying to get my husband to lose weight. Forget Celebrity Fit Club and The Biggest Loser, but welcome the 6 Flags Plan. What a way to jump start his weight reduction! In this "hot-ass summer" weather he is sure to sweat off a few pounds. Then, he can eat whatever he wants because the heat will hit him like the anvil to Wylie Coyote. Between that and the Titan he will surely toss the cookies. Besides, who wants to be in the malls on tax-free weekend.


Why I need Six Flags tickets...
By Liz Newsome

All summer, I have been overly-hydrated and spoiled by high-powered air conditioners - protecting me from this ridiculous triple-digit heat. I believe the only way to remedy this is to spend a day out in the blistering, relentless Texas sun in the middle of August. I mean, what better way to zap all of your energy, sweat off 10 pounds waiting in lines for hours, allow my irritations to grow and eventually erupt in an explosive display, and to top it all off, come back all red and crispy from the damaging UV rays! Skin cancer - here I come!

Of course - misery loves company, so I would need tickets to drag my unwilling friends with me! They deserve to be just as hot, sweaty, tired, and thirsty as I do. Not only that, but if I went by myself, no one would be around to hear the mocking comments about all of the "unique" people who frequent amusement parks. A day there is usually an exercise in self-confidence boosting in itself. The people-watching alone is things legends are made of!

I am a Florida gal - so I have been to Busch Gardens, Disney World, and Universal - along with many lesser theme parks in the Southeast. Only moving here last year at this time, I am yet to visit any Texas-based amusement centers, which is vital to my thrill-ride, roller coaster education.

Also, I have a compulsive need to get things for free. Many events and activities I will only attend if I can find some way to attend at no charge to myself. So many things these days are overpriced that it really isn't worth my less-than-hard-earned-dollars to buy the admission myself. It is a bit of an obsession I have developed, maybe even an addiction. And you seem like the kind of person who would like to feed an addict's habit.

Thank you for your consideration and for allowing me to cleverly beg for the tickets,
I always enjoy a challenge and a pointless email during work!

Ok, I am going to make this short and sweet. I hate the heat, I hate
lines, and more importantly, I hate people in general. My girlfriend has
been bugging me ALL summer to go to six flags, I keep telling her that
things are not fun when you MISERABLE. I do not want to go and suffer all
day, I have had a great summer, a good job, a lot of fun, and this is the
last thing I thought I needed. But as I was thinking, I need one solid day
of me being in discomfort. If I got these tickets, my girlfriend would be
very happy and I would be looking for excuses to not go, but of course she
always wins and I would go anyways.

If you give me these tickets, I will appreciate my life so much more and
will realize that I have been taking air-conditioning, cheap sodas and food,
and no waiting in line for bathrooms, all for granite. Please give me these
tickets. Do it to make me a better person, not for the adrenaline rushes or
the thrill of mickey mouse. Please, I need this to put me back in shape.

I deserve these tickets because I live in the ANT INFESTED Gates de Provence Luxury Apartments located at the intersection of Marsh & Frankford. There is nothing LUXURIOUS about those apt unless you like the PHAROAH ANTS to eat your undergarments and end up in a locked fireproof safe. Please provide me and my family a day away from the ANTS!!!

In this 700 degree Texas heat, I LOVE to have sweat dripping from every pore of my body. I love to smell the stinky odor coming from everyone walking past and squishing up next to me in the long, long lines waiting for to ride the Titan. I love having my husband tell me that he’s too chicken to ride the Superman Tower of Power with me….so I need the tickets because he told me that the next time we go to Six Flags, he will ride it with me. I am dying to see the fear in his eyes when I remind him of that promise he made J I need these tickets because I need a thrill – I need to see the white behind my eyelids as I black out on the loops of the Shockwave. I need to feel my stomach fly up to the backs of my teeth when I ride the Cliffhanger (Mock Force or something now). I need need, NEED to be one of those crazy Texans who choose to spend the entire day outside in the dead of summer when I could choose to walk next door to Hurricaine Harbor.

Hi my name is Jessica and I'm going to give you reasons why i want and need these tickets. I'm going to be quite honest with you. I flat out want them so me and my friends can get out and away from our kids for a day! I know its hot as hell but it is all worth it.And with the way me and some of my girlfriends are gaining weight we might not be able to get on some of these rides much (If you were to ever see me you would understand what I'm talking about.) Oh and its summer time so you know all types of hot guys are out and about. I think its ironic that every time i do go there is always a hot guy selling dip n dots! lol I'm not much to look at but i sure like doing some What it all comes down to is i really want these tickets and i might not have made you laugh like somebody else has so if i didn't entertain you how about you ask me to do something else. I don't really care what it is. I think at this point i would be willing to do something stupid or humiliating for them. lol Just let me know. And may the best person win.


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