Monday, December 26, 2005

Useless Each Without The Other...

The past couple days have been a bit odd. I was invited to a Christmas Eve soiree' for all of us that are flying solo for the holiday. An interesting assortment of people and all went well. To my surprise I was asked to stay the evening with a friend (completely platonic thank you). The bedroom I stayed in was, how shall we say, different. A big painting of breasts and a huge eye hook in the ceiling -- things to make you say "Hmmmmm." Long story short, I inadvertantly ended up house/dog sitting as my friend ended up getting sick.

Anyway, so the sick friend called tonite and said she's had 3 guys call her from the party to find out if I was available. Another guy that I know from the Corvette club called her to find out if I really had a boyfriend because he's heard me mention him before but he's never seen him. He was assured that the boyfriend really does exist but he doesn't go to any of the same things as I.

That was so odd for me because it seems like the boyfriend and I have so much in common but evidentally there are third parties who perceive us as not having things in common since he's rarely seen with me.

This got me to wondering about a lot of things realtionship-wise this evening. Are all "couples" joined at the hip - do they attend everything together? That seems like it would be a bit stiffling but in retrospect, the Vette guy that was asking about me has seen me dozens of times over the years but has never seen "the boyfriend." Even if we aren't running around together everywhere, it would seem like people would at least have had a visual of him in 10 years.

I want people to know the boyfriend is in my life - and an important part of it. It makes me feel weird to think there are people out there that think he's a "phantom".

I sometimes wonder if I'm chasing a dream but then I think about what things are like when it's just he and I. I feel happy - calm - and most importantly loved. I know we both have good and bad days but for the vast majority of the time things are ideal when it's just he and I. It's like when we first met in New York City - for the first time in years I was "content" to just be calm and at peace and he was the reason for that. I know he doesn't want to believe it - but it's true. He has that affect on me. I'm a bit gun-shy of relationships but he managed to change all of that because he really wanted to get to know me and no one has ever done that before.

He said that we are going to go somewhere tropical for next Christmas. So one of my immediate goals is to get more toned and take some swimming classes - it's been years since I seriously swam. And then, to get Scuba certified. He loves diving and I want to experience that.

I love seeing life through his eyes because he is so insanely observant. I feel like I am always looking at the distant goal and I forget to see what's right in front of me -- he reminds me to do that and I'm glad for that because I would otherwise overlook so much.

True love is eternal - it transcends everything. One of the most beautiful things he's ever said to me was a Longfellow quote --

"though she bends him, she obeys him;
though she draws him, yet she follows;
useless each without the other...."


Javier Marti said...

Well done! Good end for that post. If you love the guy, damn what everyone else says. It DOESN^T matter as long as you are happy. And if he makes you happy, who cares who knows him or doesn`t? Look, I had this thing in relationships before, and we all have to learn to love and accept the other as they are. It is completely normal to attend things alone, and also good for the relationship. What you do alone, later you bring in and you enrich the relationship even more. You are lucky if you love him and feel loved. Damn the rest of us!

KoldKadavr said...

Feliz navidad, goirl!
This may help U.S. to grow-up!
Literally and figuratively.
God bless you!

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