Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Groupies

I was informed today that I have groupies. "As if -- I do not," I replied. "Oh yes you do!" "Who would be a groupie of mine?" Supposedly some biker boy types are groupies of mine. I don't see it and then the "eyes" and "voice" were mentioned....then the hair. I think I sighed and rolled my eyes.

The first time I was told I had bedroom eyes was in high school -- by a girl no less. Seems I was asking a question, I didn't exactly buy the answer and I kind of looked at her and she said, "Oh, don't turn those bedroom eyes on me." To say I was taken aback by that comment would be an understatement.

It's kind of weird though because a lot of people tell me they remember me because of the eyes. I don't know what makes mine different -- they are brown, very dark brown -- not malachite green or ice blue. Brown. I don't wear much, if any, shadow -- just eyeliner and mascara for the most part.

Then there's the voice ....Lord help me, the "phone sex" voice. So many times I've heard I have a phone sex voice -- and that's in a professional situation! What the devil do you say in response to something like that? I've always considered my voice kind of weak -- I admit it's soft and that I don't project it well. It's the first thing to give out when I come down with something and the last thing to recover.

Then you have the hair -- my security blanket. I used to say that I was glad I didn't have that big ass Texas hair thing going on. But, one day I was flipping through a book by Helen Bryant Fixin' To Be Texan and she discusses Texas hair and says women wear it 1 of 2 ways here -- either all spritzed up and sprayed within an inch of its life OR really long because people have always oo'ed and ahh'ed over it so they can never bring themselves to cut it.

Obviously I fall into the later category. I have guys that I barely know that ask to shampoo it -- brush it -- run their hands through it......makes me shudder since I have that quasi-Howard Hughes'ish anti-germ thing going on.

But this whole converstion made me think of my first real experience with groupies.

Duran Duran played a sold out show at Reunion Arena in Dallas. My tix were on the floor and afterwards my friends were going to try to get me into a very popular club where they knew the management -- obviously I was underage at that point. So, I had dressed well due to going to the club later. (Ffor the record, I don't recall where the parents were as they were gone more often than not so I had lots of "me" time).

While mingling on the floor with people I knew from school, I made my way up to the front of the stage and asked a guy who was standing there if he was there for the sound check -- he was. I asked if the opening band was good -- he told me they were. I said something along the lines of "Cool -- thanks!" and turned to walk away. The guy called after me and said, "Hey, was that all you wanted to know?" It was. So then he said, "Come back after the show and I'll take you backstage to meet Duran." I smiled and said thanks but thinking to myself all the time, "Yeah, right."

The show was stellar, had a great time and as they went into the encore I decided, "What the hell," and primped the makeup a bit. So the show is over and I tell my friends I'd catch up to them later. They thought I was insane. But I told them I had cab fare so not to worry. Honestly, it was Duran Duran, I was 16 and I adored them - especially Nick Rhodes -- so why not see if I could get the program signed.

I kind of hung back watching the scene and the crowd made their way out. There was a gaggle of girls at the front of the stage screaming for any remnants from the stage to be thrown their way -- guitar picks, towels, drumsticks, etc. Security started making their way towards them to escort them out and that's when I made my move and walked towards the front. The guy that I had spoken to earlier was about to walk backstage and I called out, "Hey, remember me?" He smiled and came over to the front, grabbed my hand and led me behind the barrier.

For some reason I glanced over my left shoulder towards the girl gaggle and oh my God if looks could have killed I would have been dead on the spot.

So backstage there's all this activity with people rushing about and I stand to the side out of the way and start chatting with some other people back there. Simon Le Bon is out first from getting showered and changed -- he signed my program, then Roger Taylor and then as the activity level increases, John Taylor glances down at me, grabs my arm with a smile and says, "Let's go!"

So as I'm hustled towards one of 6 black limos I glance up to see lines of fans surrounding the fence above us at the back of Reunion. Everyone jumps into the cars and they literally peeled out. As we approached the freeway the cars split all going in different directions -- except for 2 of them.

Those 2 cars actually held the band -- the others were decoys. As we made out way to the Mandalay at Las Colinas the guys were chatting, asking questions and just as pleasant and courteous as could be. I remember they particularly liked the fact that the planes could taxi over the roadway at DFW Airport -- silly, but they said how kewl they thought that was.

So once we got to the hotel, everyone made their way to the bar and the drinks were flowing. I thnk I had one and I finally met Nick Rhodes - I was heartbroken because he was about 4" shorter than I but he was still damn cute.

At some point through the darkened exterior windows we could see real groupies running around -- spandex, tube tops, etc. Everything that they thought they should be wearing. What was most memorable was the change in the band -- they lost their maturity and began making the crassest comments about the girls. I'm not going to go into detail, but suffice to say if the girls had heard them, they would have been horrified. And something about that moment really stuck with me about what boys in the bands really like and what they don't.

About 2am, I said good night to the people I had met and went out to the lobby to get a cab.

Honestly, did you expect this story to end with me romping about with one of the guys?

Please....I'm not a groupie nor do I want any of my own!
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1 comment:

kevin said...

""So many times I've heard I have a phone sex voice -- and that's in a professional situation! What the devil do you say in response to something like that?""

Ask them how they know what a sex phone voice sounds like.